How Genealogy Saves Memories For An Eternal Life!

by Teréza Eliasz-Solomon (HeiressMommy™)

I am happily married to a brilliant genealogist – I have often explained my own Jewish appreciation for what he does by emphasizing the value of keeping memories alive for new generations. When he and I decided to go through expensive and often difficult fertility treatments to have our twin sons, part of that decision is that my husband so badly wanted children to carry on his legacy and I did as well. We felt that we could create a family together that would honor both of our ancestral lineage and thus give new and continuing life to those that had gone before us.

My Jewish faith is very specific about the importance of the begets …from them came us and so and so on.  The tragedy is that throughout our history so many have attempted and failed [thank G-d] to destroy us and any documentation that we Jews existed. As G-d’s chosen people …that was not to be – we remained and thrived. Mark Twain and many other non Jews have spoken eloquently of the Hebrews major contributions and marks on civilization – all making another de facto assurance that we, the Jews, would always be remembered.

Even though my husband is not Jewish, our children are being raised 100% in the Jewish faith. Additionally, my amazing husband decided that he wanted to legally assume my Jewish maiden name and so on 10January2012 after a costly/complicated legal process he became Chester Michael Eliasz-SOLOMON, as did I and our children – which resulted in making us four the ONLY and uniquely Eliasz-Solomons. We now are seriously considering growing our little dynasty by adding more children …our frozen embryos tempting us to add to the genealogy tree [even if this time it means having a gestational carrier make that possible]. Of course, part of this dynastic effort is ego in that we enjoy seeing our efforts result in worthy prodigy but we are also sincere in wanting to create those type of individuals who are truly worthy of G-d’s grace. Because we became parents later in life – we are blessed with the benefit of time and wisdom with which to raise our darling children.

Genealogy does not always mean acknowledging relatives as any more than tree place holders. Sadly, my husband has had to delete or marginalize some rather unseemly and embarrassing family tree characters [he is now planning an even further effort by listing some loathsome types as merely child #1, #2, #3 in his family tree]  and yet he also had the joy of highlighting a few more distant/newly discovered relatives we are proud to include. This dismissal style of family structure [what my genealogist husband calls “pruning the branches”] is as old as the Bible and certainly rather common in Royal families where illegitimacy or at time idiocy denied entry into the official family tree. As with many issues in my blog posts – both ongoing litigation and my 2013 book “Heiress Mommy …The Life Of A modern Super Woman!” obligations render me somewhat mute on this very interesting aspect of our life story. Suffice it to say it is a glorious and spectacular story – one we believe will inspire all people who are seeking to right wrongs and establish the fine and worthy family of their dreams.

Both my genealogist husband and I believe in the idea of an afterlife defined by our earthy deeds – this part of Judaism is a template for a life well lived – a life whose legacy is not only one of earthly accomplishments but equally of a life where love, compassion and assistance to others was paramount. To this point, it is very important to not only be defined by an accidental blood line but instead to weed out the evil doers and to make good and worthy the family legacy by conscious and decisive familial connections. I have joined my husband in working hard and long to establish a legally recognized [through disowning and disinheritance]  family unique and special – one that includes ONLY those that G-d would grant the blessing of eternal remembrance on account of their good hearts and honorable deeds. When asked if this does not somehow delineate  from the purpose of genealogical research – we readily answer that it does not and is actually what is most amazing about a family trees done with pure intentions – that is taking the time and effort to establish a group of individuals in memory that one would want their offspring to remember and possibly emulate in their own life.

I will conclude with the mention of our beautiful Jewish memorial prayer called Kaddish. It is said by loved ones and is multi purposeful. This prayer helps those reciting it by forcing the reader to reestablish a relationship with G-d despite the hurt of loss. Kaddish also demands remembrance over and over again of the loved one now gone from this earthly world. As I often instruct Jew and Gentile alike – my faith teaches that remembrance truly is a form of eternal life. Remembering  revises the individual who is gone through thought and sharing which often means describing a deceased person with someone they never even knew – so you can see that this means the now passed one can be alive again in conversation and the minds of others.

We are all star dust – descended from the heavens …take time to find and connect those worthy of remembrance in your genealogical personal dynasty. May G-d bless us all with the best connections to the past, the present and the future!!!

P.S.  PLEASE be sure to read my most amazing husband’s genealogy blog @ Stanczyk – Internet Muse …you can thank me later!

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