Archive for November, 2013

November 16, 2013

Carve the Turkey and Spin the Dreidel

by Teréza Eliasz-Solomon (HeiressMommy™)

I have a little dreidel. I made it out of clay.
When it’s dry and ready, then dreidel I shall play.
Oh dreidel, dreidel, dreidel, I made it out of clay.
Oh dreidel, dreidel, dreidel, then dreidel I shall play.

Thanksgiving2013This long loved Jewish childhood song goes on … the REAL joy is in the sharing of fun and truth about our people’s long history of survival and perseverance. Even Hanukkah – without a doubt a less, shall we say, serious Jewish holiday than Passover and Yom Kippur is based on yet another miracle. We are a people whose very existence defines the term miracles – so many have sought our demise and yet we thrive and are present in every nation. No matter the reason – miracle, fortitude or luck – the glory in our story is one for all peoples and that is, with faith and determination, you shall be free. Sounds like the American story as well – and here we find Hanukkah 5774 and Thanksgiving 2013 on the same day. Of course, we get eight days but still this happenstance is worth consideration for is not freedom a universal desire and are not we Jews setting out over and over again for new lands that which the Pilgrims also did?

Surely the admittance of REAL facts concerning the Native Americans and the first Thanksgiving in America must be acknowledged here – are the grade school learned tales of friendship and closeness between Pilgrims and often termed Indians true or convenient fiction? The truth is ninety Native Americans and fifty-three Pilgrims sat down to the first three day harvest celebration in America – without question there was indeed a coming together in friendship but additionally there is no doubt that the entirety of our origins is replete with horrors against the Native people. Still there is no equivocation that when President Abraham Lincoln in 1863 declared this a Federal Holiday, the divine tone of the great American experiment was something to be celebrated.

So this year we Americans Jew are especially made grateful in remembering both our own miracle of Hanukkah and the miracle of a great nation like America … each a beacon to the world of REAL possibilities. For is not one example of perseverance, glory and victory example and template for all others who struggle against REAL tyranny? Each year many in the Jewish community choose a larger task [for those of our faith and all others] to address during Hanukkah – for me it is Light Up Literacy for Hanukkah. No matter which, the decision to use our miracles to create a better life for those Jewish and not defines the tonality of what a holiday of gratitude should be – both Thanksgiving and Hanukkah reasons to spread across the world a message of hopefulness and resolve that REALLY miraculous occurrences are the result of determination and G-d’s blessings!

P.S. In my year end (2013) memoir, Heiress Mommy … A Modern Super Woman Life! and recently decided Summer 2014 Life Journey of Heiress Mommy! the details of how my life has been full of REAL miracles will be shared, as well as a little something about my dear clever late Mother’s “orphan Thanksgiving” and how my husband and I plan to continue this tradition once living in our new “main”  home [hint – more soon]. What is this holiday fete? Well it is the Saturday after Thanksgiving and all are invited – those who were at a place they had rather not be or no where invited or working, etc. on the traditional Turkey day. Ours will be a grand event – full of gaiety and joy to be shared by all the REALLY amazing family, friends, colleagues and neighbors that the Eliasz-Solomon family is blessed with … details and photos will be shared!!!

November 10, 2013

REAL Gratitude on Veterans Day

by Teréza Eliasz-Solomon (HeiressMommy™)

Poem For a Today-A Soldier’s Cemetery, by John William Streets died at the Somme 1st July 1916

Behind that long and lonely trenched line
To which men come and go, where brave men die,
There is a yet unmarked and unknown shrine,
A broken plot, a soldier’s cemetery.

There lie the flower of youth, the men who scorn’d
To live (so died) when languished Liberty:
Across their graves flowerless and unadorned
Still scream the shells of each artillery.

When war shall cease this lonely unknown spot
Of many a pilgrimage will be the end,
And flowers will shine in this now barren plot
And fame upon it through the years descend:
But many a heart upon each simple cross
Will hang the grief, the memory of its loss.

VeteransDay1Who among us REALLY comprehends the moment when one dies in service to this nation – is there a thought of a grander ideal for which the life is being cut short or the more universal and probably longing for loved ones, as well as thoughts of G-d? Asking this question seems important to me as so much is made of the heroics, the bigger picture of nation and flag in remembering our war dead – and in acknowledging the service of veterans still living. But in the end these are REAL men and women – and as of late, I am daunted by the “lip service” to honor those gone and those returning. Budget cuts detailed, designed and passed into law by the most vocal “My country tis of thee …” members of Congress that affect our veterans and their families.

The pathos and ethos of remembrance entails a consideration of the reality that faced those willing to serve … As we did with the GI Bill following WWII, we need again to make education, housing and unlimited health care available to our returning arm service people. Arguing about the justification of sending Americans into battle is for another time but here, today, as we mark Veterans Day we must commit to a totality of obligation to these men, women and their families – this is the only true and REAL way to be of one heart with those who fought for this nation. Sentiments and expresses of gratitude remain an important gesture – as kind thoughts do help heal – however, no words of thanks can nor should replace REAL concrete care giving and services for veterans.

As a Jewish American – with family, including my Uncle Milton Solomon (Ancestry link) who was a Bronze Star recipient and was fortunate to return from WWII to live a long and productive life before being laid to rest in Arlington National Cemetery, having served – I more than most know all too well that my very life is based on those who fought against the Nazis. I never miss an opportunity to thank, shake the hand of and offer an embrace to a heroic WWII vet – being sure to tell them I and my family live only because they fought against those determined to eradicate my Jewish people from this earth. No hyperbole in believing this REAL fact. The personal for me is the general in that as a Jew, I – make that we as a people – know what fighting tyranny REALLY means. Likewise to feel personally indebted for my life and those of my Jewish children to the brave Americans, that included many Jews, who fought against the evil scourge of the Nazis is only a REAL and salient truth. I have the additional life blessing of having been married [my first/widowed May 2001] to my husband David, whose dear Father was a Colonel in the WWII Air Force. Knowing and loving Harold as I did – hearing his stories of valor and then visiting where he and family lived in England post war has brought to my life a even further REAL life awareness of what a veteran feels. My second and amazing husband, Chester Michael Eliasz-Solomon, a genealogist,  has integrated this history into his and my family history, visiting both my Uncle and father-in-law in Arlington National Cemetery. Both he and I fully believe that our much wanted Jewish children would not have been possible if not for men like these.

So on Veterans Day wave a flag, thank a veteran, buy a service person a meal and tell Congress to take care of these men and women – do this as if your and your children life depends on it because it REALLY does. May G-d bless our service people, our fallen heroes, our veterans and their families and May G-d bless America!!!

P.S. I want to thank my Belfast dear friend, who I love dearly, Valerie Corbett for sharing with me the above soldier’s poem. In my  memoir  Life Journey of Heiress Mommy! I hope to explain how and why my very diverse and truly spectacular family made sure the REAL values of patriotism were a part of our life!

November 6, 2013

The Apology Fallacy!

by Teréza Eliasz-Solomon (HeiressMommy™)

apologiesSorry, Sorry, Sorry …” they say or maybe not but either way to what REAL extent do those words – in response to that which is now a fait accompli – REALLY matter? Often feigned, forced and certainly frequently insincere the idea of an apology is futile unless and until supported by REAL and concrete actions … in fact no REAL benefit occurs to perpetrator nor victim from a “falling on ones sword” admittance of wrongdoing in circumstances where no further representation of remorse is present. Unless – now you dear readers just knew I had an exception in mind – the evil doer has integrated as REAL fact that which he or she is guilty of and as such no longer remains convinced of their innocence. Projection, denial or nothing more than deliberated deceit nullifies the guilty parties ability to comprehend and rectify through productive effort that sin for which an apology is and should only be the beginning. Rendered worthless are the words used to express emotion supposed as awareness for the slight, egregious act or crime. What alternative exist one might ask to demonstrate error of behavior toward ones fellow besides apology? Possibly the biblical eternal question of right and wrong, deed and action or neglect shall never be REALLY answered – the trials and errors of we humans now regulated by laws and standards are the only viable current solution available but we need to examine the nuances save the proliferation of subterfuge the allows the dishonest to prevail.

The Apology is Plato’s version of the speech given by Socrates as he defended himself in 399 B.C. against the charges of corrupting the young, and not believing in the gods in whom the city believes. So in this ancient and historical text we find a defense motive – still often used by defendants as part of the plea phase as they hope for Judge and jury to believe their remorseful feelings for that crime they stand now convicted of. Socrates says that the old charges stemmed from years of gossip and prejudice against him and hence were difficult to address. Are not most of us – certainly those of you my frequent readers or personally acquainted know to be my personal case as The Miscreants™ have lied and projected onto my husband and myself erroneous wrong doings – forced to deal with from haters and usurpers chargers originating in prejudicial gossip? Indeed confusing and quite troubling is the baleful insistence that predators – including my own nemesis – profess that it is we the victims who should be creating an apologetic forum. Such a suggestion has been made in relation to the last ten years [and more before that for my dear husband] of the criminal vandalism, theft, deceit, threats, harassment, slander, defamation and stalking myself and my family have experienced at the hands of my husband’s ex-wife, her three children and their cohort Michigan miscreants and recently their hometown friends. Only one example is when my husband’s ex-wife’s children criminally vandalized his home in Summer 2003 [we met and married a few moths later]; the police present who I later became well acquainted with said in interviewing them no remorse was evident and needless to say no apology was ever forthcoming. Law enforcement, attorneys and mental health professionals advising us on upcoming litigation against these individuals and possible criminal charges, explain that this is surely indicative of sociopaths behavior. I have likened this to catching a child with hand in cookie jar and they then being angry at us the parent discovering their bad behavior … my husband and I refused to accept their fallacious behavior and instead decided to expose REAL truths of our sworn enemies – causing them to deny and invent faux alternative scenarios and justifications. Thinking I would find shameful that which I acknowledged [only the true parts] in my own life story – they became so frustrated as to actually commit REAL crimes and now allow us to seek financial rewards for damages. Do I or any of my advisers believe these miscreants and misanthropes will ever offer a sincere apology?  Well truth be told – only if whatever attorney they manage to hire for upcoming lawsuits and possible trials, insist they do as part of an agreement. Obviously this falls quite neatly into the category of an apologetic fallacy – agree?

We have all seen the politician caught in a scandalous love affair give his or her public apology of wrong doing and plea for forgiveness by spouse, family and constituents. Trust me as one who has a publicist for years, while possibly heartfelt, it is still at the recommendation of the professionals employed to guide image and make better the now scarred image of that public figure. So often those in place of power are forced into an apologetic posture that means little if anything about the true matter at hand … to initiate and sustain a difference in behavior, to rectify and make whole that which was destroyed is the REAL goal that must be present if sincere and righteousness of character is in mind. My Jewish faith is quite clear on there being no REAL external guidance more important than the intrinsic motivation that directs one by G-d to do well, make complete and live as if improved toward those wronged as the REAL and hopefully sustainable path. History is carpeted with tale and woe of those professing apology for deed and thought – to what end have these admittance of ill behavior and asking for forgiveness been documented? Is not the REAL glorified lesson learned examples from individuals who sought to correct their ways and in realization of that which caused damage or hurt, is not the end resulting blessed us with something much more valuable than the “I am sorry …” words?

P.S. In my upcoming memoir, Heiress Mommy… A Modern Super Woman Life! and follow-up, Life Journey of Heiress Mommy! every REAL detail of how owning, as I have, ones REAL life narrative frees you from the fallacy of apology, for a life REALLY well lived is without such need!!!

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