Posts tagged ‘Love’

March 20, 2013

My Heterosexual Love Affair with REAL Women!

by Teréza Eliasz-Solomon (HeiressMommy™)

Sappho_and_Erinna_in_a_Garden_at_MytileneNow don’t get all excited my darling readers … no salacious or sexual escapades will be discussed in this particular blog post. Mainly because there are none to describe in relationship to myself and other women. This is not a Lesbian tutorial nor a dismissal of those who are – in fact, a few of my best friends are in same sex relationships and I worked tirelessly for/am thrilled that this nation is finally going to be a REALLY equal place for them to live and love.  No I am not gay but I REALLY do love women. But oh baby – betcha my title got many REALLY interested. Glad I caught your attention because I know you will enjoy the whys and hows of how I am in love – platonic of course  – with many, many REALLY fine women. For those of you who read my blog regularly or know me personally, then it comes as no surprise that I am blessed with the most amazing female companionship – REAL family and friends, colleagues and associates of the female gender who I adore and they me. I have even gleaned the benefits of women I now consider REAL friends via social media sites like Facebook and Twitter – women who have defended and protected me from slights or others evilness and have now become part of my life forever [G-d willing]. I am part of a club – that which is a gathering of REALLY worthy females and I am thrilled. Sit back and read carefully as I regale you with all the delicious  but never lecherous  details of my gal crushes – the famous and infamous among them.

Indulge me with a wee bit of divergent topic discussion here – still REALLY relevant to the idea being reviewed in this blog post however: One of the most ridiculous blogs I  have ever read is a Chicago gay guy’s diary which mostly includes who he sleeps with, what faux couture clothes he wears, what he is eating, how his cat behaves, how much he disdains his Mother’s lower middle class suburban lifestyle [which apparently includes and he hated shopping at Boscov’s] – all with the poseur “I” as primary genre. Rarely a political, sociological nor other than self word in his blog – in fact even when finally writing after 3 years about his dead sister, only how it affected him is detailed, despite the fact that he, his Mother and sister reaped nearly $195,000 each from a wrongful death suit after that poor (apparently nearly now) forgotten 20 year was killed.  My psychiatrist gal pal believes possible mental health issues [for which this person was indeed once hospitalized for as a teenager] are at play. Hmm … why bring that up here when the topic is my gal romances? Simple you see – I will never write such a narcissistic obvious neuroses laden diatribe in simple minded diarist form as the loser offspring of the woman who is my husband and my nemesis when what I claim to be describing is my caring for others. You know his kind – works as a waiter but insist on describing himself as a “writer” – despite never having a REAL book deal or any such prospect – relevant to my topic here in that this creepy guy also is constantly berating  and mocking those he has [gay] romantic affections towards.  So now with that off my mind … I do the opposite of Chicago legally disowned/disinherited, fatherless criminal vandal [oh my – how did that slew of hints come out of my lap top???] and champion my same sex crushes. Bet you dear readers thought my referencing The Miscreants™ was over – no, no, no but lawsuits beginning soon and law enforcement seem to be wrapping up investigations – now we will be sharing REAL news articles and such with you all – here and elsewhere. However thought a bit of comparative analysis is appropriate as one of the loathsome offspring of THE REAL Devil’s Daughter™ is indeed gay – as my husband and I are huge supporters of the LGBT community, we are disgusted that an individual such as this self indulgent and REALLY delusional person could be thought to represent our gay brethren. Relevant here too is that the so called “friends” females of  THE REAL Evil Doers Club™  that this Chicago fellow is involved with  – these loathsome women really nothing more than cohorts in efforts against myself, my husband and our REAL family. These women by just about everyone aware of them determination are certainly not females worthy of admiration by any REALLY accomplished woman – they are the polar opposite  to the amazing women I love and am loved by. By observing these creatures, one can easily come to understand that not ALL of my gender are to be championed. Nothing genuine about such pretenders and definitely no core value to such women. But that is REALLY for times to come and trust me all will be made public – my REAL women friends will be by my side in triumph and victory then too.

Well now lets us get back to moi  – shall we? I am a flaming – some might say obsessed sexually with my REALLY sexy husband  – heterosexual female.  But you must understand that if I were a Lesbian – I would still be REALLY crazy about the women I will describe here – only I would be dating them with any luck. In previous blog posts like, The Goddess Crew™ [26 August 2012],  I shared my blessing of REAL lady friends – women near and far who are my constant support and glory. Like all young girls, there were for me many schoolmates, club friends, cousins and more to bond with in my youthful girlfriend style – the sleep overs and constant bestie types companions all through primary school years and even into college and graduate school. The friends that were bequested on account of a familial relationship equally important and into young adulthood and newly married status female compatriots always served as my stability. Lucky me to have guys as friends too but the girls and women who were there to cuddle, to commiserate, to run to my side – oh those sweet darling ladies of my life who still pick up the pieces when I break a little and I them – these are such a REALLY sweet refrain in my life. Intimate is the only way to define those relationships between us gals because many times it is just that – intimate and REALLY personal. Women will clean another if ill, help coif and dress without embarrassing, feed and administer care if their friend is ill and counsel during struggles. Again, I must be 100% truthful – I have men who have done the same for me but no more REALLY platonic intimate relationship can ever exist then that between two women who REALLY love one another. So yes my readers – I have real “crushes” on my gal pals – love, love, love my lady friends in so many ways and so very deeply – no equivocation about it – these are REAL love affairs in my very full and REALLY blessed life.

Now lets chat about my head over heels admiration and at times almost groupie like affection for the famed past and present who share my XX chromosomes.There are  writers, poets, historical figures, politicians  journalist, activist and others in my fondly held in my heart  repartee – so many women  to admire throughout history and into present day modernity. I fall madly in love and force everyone around me to listen about my respect and fondness for the women of the Bible, the leaders of nations that I enthusiastically read about like CleopatraCatherine the Great, Golda Meir, etc., etc.. In other posts I list each tome that capture my attention concerning these women. I fall into a trance while following life stories of famous, well known and those more obscure women who created and discovered so many contributions to this world. I have had a plethora of “Oh my” moments – wanting to know everything about these women and not to forget their names – all this and more has been a REAL love affair for me. Not all my gal crushes are long gone – there is our late Jacqueline Kennedy, Coretta King, Secretary and hopefully future U.S. President Hillary Clinton , our magnificent current First Lady, Michelle Obama, my feminist template Gloria Steinem and all the female members of the United States Supreme Court. Two of my Jewish “sisters” in the political world must be remembered too – Representatives Debbie Wasserman Schultz [like myself a breast cancer survivor] and the brave courageous Gabby Gifford – both women deeply connected to me and I do love them very much. Likewise, I fawn over artists and entertainers – some not main stream like Marina Abramovic and others quite popular like Barbra Streisand, Bette Midler and the like. I am especially fond of my equally litigious – sue the slanderous and defaming bastards similar to me, Catherine Zeta Jones … yes indeed, this beauty and her husbandman Michael Douglas are like myself and my husband – no such offense should go unchallenged is our shared philosophy with this star couple. Why even my JAP “sisterSarah Jessica Parker has me smitten … talented woman who struggled to become a Mother [like myself having achieved REAL pregnancy and now considering gestational carrier to grew our wonderful family] and NYC dweller are two things we soon will have in common. I admire and workout to Beyonce, Adele and the more Avant- garde Nora Jones. I can not live without hearing classical music performers , such as violinist Lindsey Sterling. Being a  fashionista  type and filling my closets with REAL couture has me adoring designers like Diane von Furstenberg [like myself – she is a REAL Jewish Princess] and Donna Karan , Stella McCartney – both also Jewish ladies [bet you did not know Linda McCartney was Jewish and therefore so is daughter Stella]. Not being huge TV viewers in our homes leaves me pining for the erudite news provider and commentator Rachel Maddow and her similarly astute female news types – including Andrea Mitchell who I had the pleasure of meeting many years ago. I can not leave out entrepreneurial types like Facebook’s Sheryl Sandberg and Yahoo’s Marissa Mayer – so much in the news these days.  Being a life long athletic type and sports enthusiast I am also a huge fan of women like American ulta runner Diane Van Deren  – I have been a runner for almost 45 years now and she/others inspire me each day. There are my lady sports heroes that can not go without mention – recently retired basketball coach, Pat Summitt, among them. There are so many women who I adore … I respect and admire – far too many to list here.  Sadly, I also have my “if only we had met ladies” like dear lost too soon Nora Ephron, who I wrote about in my post, Losing Nora Ephron [27 June 2102] and others I will now never meet but always honor in memory. There are others that my heart and mind simply can not help but love – the young Malala Yousafzai who was shot in Pakistan for her blog and desire to be educated – now happily back to school and still a voice of power. Girls and women throughout history making a difference – bravely and sweetly changing the world – how could I not fall in love over and over again ?

Now here is my most recent creme de la creme moment concerning gal crushes. I have always adored, admired and respected the actress Ellen Barkin … I am a HUGE fan. I follow her on Twitter and am determined to have her at one of my book signings if she will honor me by accepting my invites – NYC of course – when my end 2013 memoir, Heiress Mommy … A Modern Super Woman Life! is published. Anyway, I retweet her often and last week sent her a message of affection and noting that I frequently ask myself what would EB do or say? OMG!!! She responded with wonderful and very caring advise. Obviously, I saved that – my newest talisman to take out when the times are tough. By the way,  I woke my family in those early a.m. hours excitedly saying “Ellen Barkin sent me a Twitter message!”. My dear husband and later that day, friends and colleagues were happy for me – as they should be because Ms. Barkin is a REALLY great lady – and I REALLY love her.

So I end this post with respect, affection and admiration for all the REALLY great broads of the world – past and present. Sending each my virtual xoxoxo and wishes for G-d’s blessings because maybe, as the song says, It’s A Man’s World but the lyrics also include “but it wouldn’t be nothing without a woman or a girl !”!!!

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August 4, 2012

Why Being Jewish Makes Me Untouchable Or Judaism 101 For Dummies!!!

by Teréza Eliasz-Solomon (HeiressMommy™)

Proud to be a Jew – Yes I am! For me, Judaism has provided a life template and has never failed as a force for my salvation. Of course, other faiths provide the same for their followers,  but for myself Judaism is the answer and my solution for a life well lived. I am the benefactor of my own Jewish religion’s philosophies but have also benefited greatly from the REAL Christian values of friends, extended family and colleagues. For my atheists and agnostic brethren … do not fret, I acknowledge that humanists can and are good, decent and caring. I also recognize and admit that religion has often been used for justification of war and mistreatment of others. What I write here is an expression of my own personal relationship to G-d that is guided and informed by Judaism. My hope is that ALL good, decent and worthwhile people who read this will be directed toward a spiritual life. The rest – those oft referenced  miscreants, evil doers, “cult” participants/false idol worshipers and usurpers can be punished by their own evil deeds, as G-d [and the legal system] sees fit.

Judaism 101 – a primer for Jew and Gentile alike offers a synopsis of why G-d chose us and gave we Jewish people the directive for monotheism. Like other groups, mine has members who both misunderstand and misuse the teachings of our faith … for to follow the path of Judaism is to lead a life of blessings and glory. As with much of my writing, I state here that there is no perfection – no life without struggle, missteps or failings. But there is – for me through Judaism – the chance and opportunity for a life full and blessed  with joyfulness.

My many hints and innuendos – the necessitated vagueness on account of ongoing. litigation plus more recent possible civil criminal [cyber crime] charges against those I refer to as the miscreants and my  book obligations: Heiress Mommy … A Modern Super Woman Life! again render me only able to share that there has been times of deep sorrow and often undeserved pain in my past. What I can share loud and clear is that without equivocation my entire life has been one blessed by G-d … never has there been a time when grace of faith has not saved me from tragedy. Yes there has been luck, hard work and happenstance that made a difference and somehow lead me to always a  glorious place in my life but as my husband has called me since we met and we recently trademarked, Tereza Triumphant™ is a child and benefactor of G-d.

I often tell gentiles that Judaism is not for the faint of heart … to practice well my faith is heavy lifting. Oy veh – do we have rules and must dos. Judaism has what I have deemed a definite lifestyle manual tone – there is a reason for and a suggestion about every aspect of life. No one – certainly not me – performs all exactly as Judaism instructs but for myself between daily prayer and ongoing study a continuous redirecting has never failed to get me to the best possible result. I am both informed and guided by the principle of my forefathers – Abraham, Moses, et.al. The women of the Bible – be it Ruth or Esther and the rest teach me what it means to be a good Jewish wife, mother and citizen. I often think of my brave gentile husband/father of my Jewish children, Chester Michael Eliasz-Solomon as a male Ruth who came as an outsider, converted to Judaism and begot King David [his great grandmother and hence is connected/as ancestor to the Messiah]. Ruth was a blessing to my people – much as my husband is in that he is devoted to myself, our children and my faith – my husband legally [January 2012] took my Jewish last name and as such his/our children who are being raised 100% Jewish are legally Solomons too.  A true gift in my life is that my Catholic husband keeps our homes 100%  kosher, observes Shabbot each week with me and fully participates in all Jewish holidays – but he is not singular in my life in that way as it is the same with my friends/extended non Jewish family in that they all respect and participate in my very Jewish life style.

There is, like so many other topics, a Judaism for Dummies book. I mention it not because I think most of you are too ignorant to understand my complicated and often erudite religion but because for Jew and gentile both – a path made simple and understandable can often be the bridge back to or further toward a life of faith. In this book is the pray my husband and I and G-d willing our children will repeat often and believe in fully … it is the prayer for celebrating by being present for something new:

Baruch Atah Adonai, Eloheynu Melech ha-olam, sheh-heh-chi-yanu v’key’manu v’hee-gee-anu laz’man ha-zeh.

Blessed are You, Eternal One our G-d, Universal Presence,

Who keeps us in Life always,

Who supports the unfolding of our uniqueness, and

Who brings us to this very moment for blessing.

 I end this post with this particular idea because as my husband and I have discovered, it is that our willingness to have eyes to see, hearts to feel and faith in G-d’s plan was the route to achieve all forms of success for us by being present. I gift it to ALL of you, no matter your chosen religion or lack thereof so they each of you, like me, can feel truly untouchable – never thwarted by evil, never deterred by miscreants and NEVER EVER defeated by evil!!!

July 22, 2012

My Furry Princess …Our Doggy Daughter!

by Teréza Eliasz-Solomon (HeiressMommy™)

Both my husband and I grew up with dogs as pets – I had dogs during my first marriage [widowed at nearly 21 years] but my husband’s [what he calls] youthful huge mistake practice marriage had none. It seems only after that woman was sent packing on account of unfaithfulness and other bad deeds and later married  her illicit love affair mate, did a pet canine become acceptable in her home …in fact, I named her dog for conversational purposes the F*%k You  dog [you can fill in the letters].  Anyway back to hubby & me – we decided a dog was an absolutely MUST have for our family and so in 2009 Princess Java Argus [AKC registered name] was chosen to be a part of our life.

The timing for getting our dear Java was that we had decided to begin expensive, difficult and what we were sure would be complicated fertility treatments. Never doubting that we would have more children [lost twin pregnancy early after 2003 wedding], we also were sure a dog had to be part of our households. On the advice of many professionals [vets & trainers] the decision about timing was to have our new pet trained and acclimated to life with the Eliasz-Solomon family before babies arrived. Success on all fronts – doggy wonderful and pregnancy achieved. As we now consider adding more children [possibly via a gestational carrier for our remaining embryos], we are also considering adding another or possibly two Labradors to our pack. Just as children have united us even more than already was the case,  having a dog has  been equal in making ours a REAL family.

The history of the domestication of dogs goes back thousands of years with the reasons and conditions as varied as are the many breeds we know today. The first obvious human/dog relationship was for hunting, followed by protection and finally companionship. In some ways a dog family member has been a democratization scenario as royals and all others throughout recorded history seemed to have access and ownership of canines. Who is not interested in knowing what breed is or name of a famous or infamous person’s dog – always an insight into an individual’s lifestyle and character can be found in those choices. The other significant observation about any human is how they treat and care for a dog – I often tell folks that I find it nearly impossible to be close to someone who can not love a dog. For me, Princess Java is so important that those of my friends who are not “dog people” still fret over her on account of not wanting me or my family to be worried or sad – sweet that Java has so many humans to worry about her.

Studies have shown there are many health benefits to owning a dog. A recent analysis of children proved that those who live with a dog during their first year of  life have better immune systems – probably developed by exposure to the family pet. For adults the benefits are equally substantial  …a dog can reduce stress, make one exercise through walks and play and stave off depression with unconditional love and a relief from loneliness. Dogs have helped our brave returning service people with the horrors of post traumatic stress syndrome, as well as people suffering from epilepsy, etc..

My household is quite organized, with many rituals and tasks – Java adapted and is too a wee bit compulsive about routines – our furry Princess wants her morning vitamins, breakfast and walk in a certain fashion and will announce with a slight verbal pronunciation when each meal time should occur, as well as when she thinks it is time to retire in the evening. My husband and I laugh at our pet’s insistence that nothing be moved in our homes …this unique personality trait  became apparent when she was only one year old and our housekeeper moved a Persian area rug to another room. Indeed we are a bit concerned as we become multi residential in the next year as to how the Princess will tolerate such dramatic and grand scale change.

For us Princess Java Argus was the first child born to our glorious union. We take our doggy everywhere [yes Java has been to meetings, banks, salons, etc]  and we are planning  to have her live with us for our year in Europe before the children begin full time school  – in my very weak French I keep explaining to her that she will be allowed to dine in Parisian restaurants as that is allowed there. Our family is also excited that being NYC/NY mostly full time residents by 2013 will afford Java eating in a few Manhattan bistros. We never consider the purchase  of  nor would ever allow into a car, home or anything else without knowing that it is both appropriate and safe for our children and our dog.  My wise adventurous and very creative husband is now keen on and involved in planning a Lewis & Clark type family expedition – with Java being our Seaman of course. After each of us produce at least one or two books, my husband and I want to join with our small 2, 4 or 6 [who knows at this point] children in writing a Travels With Java tome – of course by then, it might be Travels with Princess Java & Kava [name chosen already for Lab #2]. The reason book stores are so full recently of  dog tales  is because the effect on a human life as well as the benefit is so great and so often life changing that prose feels necessary about our canine companions. So I dedicate this blog post to my beautiful, sweet, intelligent, loving Princess Java Argus – who got me/us through some very difficult days when evil doers, lie spewing cheaters and even dangerous types [oh yes, did I mention Java is an excellent watch dog – alerting us to even the smallest noise or disturbance] were needed to be dealt with. Of course, these last three years with Java was one of joy and fun – our pooch is also a  great exercise companion – trying to lift my free weights, joining me on my elliptical trainer and leaning over me on my universal board lifter. The final personal note on this precious dog is that I/we are eternally grateful that G-d directed us to have Princess Java Argus join our family – the best for us and for her is yet to come!!!

I have two P.S. for my readers: #1. The above referred to F*%k You doggy that belonged to the woman my husband has so aptly named “the devil’s daughter” apparently died [to clarify it was the male dog, not the bitch that died] and was replaced –  proving to me that even wicked type evil doers can be loved by a canine companion. And #2.  Our dog’s official AKC registered name is Princess Java Argus Solomon Eliasz – we are paying to have it changed as ours was legally this past January 2012 to Princess Java Argus Eliasz-Solomon …by the way, my genealogist  husband had our pure breed Labrador’s genealogy official completed and framed – go figure.

P.P.S. As always dear readers, I so wish that I could share with more specificity details but ongoing [actually a lot of payback fun] litigation and my book obligations [2013: “Heiress Mommy …A Modern Super Woman Life!”] forbade me from telling all on my blog posts – but trust me, my book will tell EVERYTHING [about me & everyone else]. See you at the bookstores next year my darling blog followers!!!

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July 18, 2012

REAL Friends I have Known And Loved!!!

by Teréza Eliasz-Solomon (HeiressMommy™)

Making friends has never been a problem for me [in fact. most people I know chide me that I never return from errands without having met someone new] and as far as acquaintances – trust me when I say you would not want to pay my holiday card postage bill. Additionally, there are colleagues, associates, various club members that have been not only hugely supportive but also a  great pleasure in my life. The issue here is really those friends that are actually extended family …the family that one can only dream about – pray and hope for. I have been blessed with those kind of REAL friends. The very definition of friendship is uplifting – that is the desire to want what is best for another and of course,  trust. I work hard to offer that which  is the truest form of friendship – the same as that which I have definitely been the beneficiary of many times.

All my life there have been people [classmates, etc] who have been morphed into my family structure. Most among these are my dear precious best friend, Mark K. and he then was smart enough to marry [shortly after we two met/almost 30 years ago] an amazing woman who would go onto to be the sister I never had, Susie K.. These two people and later their lovely daughters (my nieces) Ashlea  and Lisa did as much and more to make my life wonderful than anyone else in this world. This is NOT hyperbole – it is indisputable fact – the K. family helped save me during a very bad time and have help make my grand life possible.

My husband and I both believe in a large and encompassing extended family structure – striving to help others, share our blessings and offering  support to those in need. The K. family are the prototype for that lifestyle choice …I am maybe their closet family friend but there are so many others my Markie and Susie have helped – counting or enumerating made impossible by the volume and details of this couple’s good deeds. Much of what they did for me, I am unable to detail here but my 2013 book: “Heiress Mommy…A Modern Super Woman Life!” will fully explain just how selfless and generous and important these people have been to me and my husband. Even though our twin sons are, as I am, Jewish – we decided no two people except these fine Catholic people could be their g-dparents – the Rabbi agreed and likewise, our attorneys felt sure these were the perfect legal guardians/trustees for our children [and our sweet Lab Princess Java Argus]. During a particular difficult time in my life – I called and wrote to their parrish priest expressing the feeling that Mark & Sue were the best example of Christianity. Both their sets of parents, Nick, Freida, Dot & the late Sam are also family to me – loving and including me as they would their own flesh and blood. The G-d given and manifested glory of true friendship is long appreciated in my Jewish faith – Ecclesiastes (4:9-10) references the ideal of having a fellow human by one’s side. I often tell friends that I see their love and support for me as a gift and worldly represenation of G-d here on earth.

There are others …dear gal pals – whom I call The Goddess Crew [which I have trademarked by the way – thinking Goddess Crew product line some day]. These lovely ladies have given me another branch of extended family by blessing me with the company of their spouses, children and family. Too many to list but there is Ana B., Marina I., Connie R., Donnamarie B., Nancy C., Tammy P., Sandy & Laura S., Chrisi W., Amy D., Miriam B., etc., etc., etc. [these are the type of girlfriends who take your calls 24/7  &  listen no matter what …just ask my Ana B. about our daily 5am chats & how when she was in Italy last year we prearranged call times each day]. Others also important in my life are those developing friendships via shared political and professional interest – Margaret, Diane, Maxine, Kim V., et.al..  The social media world has brought even more amazing special folks into my world  – the writer Erica N., Kristin C., Zac C. Abby, and so on. I can not forget the fellows  – dear Mike S., Jim, Norman, Ron, Robert M. – each having looked after me quite well and who I care for as extended family. Let me not forget the distant cousins/in laws who are friends – so too few from my dear husband’s family but there is darling Dorota, Robin & Kim to be grateful for. You see what I mean – my holiday card list is HUGE!!!

So let me end with a reminder – 15 August 2012 is National [U.S.] Best Friend Day. No matter where in this world you may live, take that day [if not before] to call, write, email or text your friends. Do NOT leave unsaid what you love and appreciate about your life companions.

P.S.  As I will when [G-d willing] the awards are given for my books or subsequent movie for “Heiress Mommy…Life Of A Modern Super Woman!” …let me state here – if I left anyone’s name out in my above lists of friends – I apologize. If you subscribe to my blog – you can tap my photo under “Chat With Tereza” – tell me I left you out & I will gladly edit this post because YOU GOTTA HAVE FRIENDS…!

July 1, 2012

The Children In My Life …My Own “Royal” We – My Family & My Friends!

by Teréza Eliasz-Solomon (HeiressMommy™)

 I am truly blessed …there are so many wonderful babies, children and young people in my life. After years of very expensive and often painful fertility treatments [and miscarriages/failed attempts] my husband and I were able to become parents of twin sons. After things are a bit more settled [soon, G-d willing this Fall] we are considering adding a few more – our frozen embryos will be luring us toward a larger family [possibly via a gestational carrier this time]. We often discuss adding four to our family but two more are a definite possibility. I am Jewish and our children are being raised not only in the Jewish faith but in the rules and disciplines my faith dictates [grant it some are the same as others faiths or ideals – respect, organization, ambition to excel]. Most parenting tips books include the doctrines of faith – whether they admit it or not. Ours is a hands on/involved plan …as my own wise Mother said, parenting is an active verb, not a noun.

There have been those biologically/others claiming to be related [adults and children] that we were forced to legally disown and disinherit – for our safety and well being. Some just too vulgar or disloyal to continue to associate with and others actually frightening due to what experts suggested to us were severe personality disorders, along with acts of vandalism against us. Just recently a colleague knowing of our horrific past circumstances [more in my 2013 book, “Heiress Mommy”] suggested I watch the DVD/read the book, “We Need To Talk About Kevin” – I did and once again realized that as a psychiatrist friend had warned myself and my husband, we are lucky – our decision to distance our family from unhealthy and what even the police thought to be dangerous people was a very smart move.

HOWEVER, there are so many others – my nieces, nephews, cousins [a few from my husband’s distant relations] and our extended family/children of amazing friends who make our life so sweet and so full. My husband joins me daily in planning our new and wonderfully expanding life – how including not only our own children but those of extended family and friends will allow us a sort of dynastic legacy and eternal remembrance of our love and good deeds.

The children of my friends [extended family] have offered joy, compassion and care during some very difficult times – I like to think I/my husband have returned in kind those gifts.  I always, as does my husband, try to address ALL children/young people with an exacting answer or conversation – striving to never ignore their situations. I like to think that it is as a result of this attentiveness that not a day goes by that one of these children do not offer me/us a hug, loving message or chat and often much needed support.

My friends are many and varied and as such their children and grandchildren are as well – the marvelous mosaic of my life made brighter by these individuals. There are too many names to list – my facebook page and iphone full of  my surrogate children but just the other day the teenage granddaughter of gal pal Anna B., Javonna S., asked why I had written about her little sister Danaya “A REAL American Girl!” and not her to date – of course her charming prelude about her being my “favorite” made that task an imperative. I promised that my next blog post – after last, “Why ACA Is Obama’s FDR Moment!” would be about her and all the blessings of the young people I love and who love me so well. Here goes Javonna dear – this one is for you:

A lively, lovely and loving teenager – that is who greets me when I visit my dear Anna B., in the personage of Javonna. A tall beauty – bright and fun and always kind to her Auntie Tereza. Of course, as with all relationships, closeness means concern and responsibility – as such I worry now that Javonna drives – I am always being the good Jewish Mother type – reminding her of caution and awareness of others on the road. I think too often parents only think they care – REAL caring is being sure/taking the time, energy and money to ensure our young people drive safe vehicles. I have known of too many tragedies that could have been prevented if parents or other adults were not so laissez fare about what the young adults in their life were doing – it seems some adults believe in an almost usury relationship with the children in their care in that these adults only do the minimum over sight/that most convenient for their own life. Such is not the case for me …I worry, I call, I text, email and do everything in my power [no matter how busy my own life is] to ensure Javonna and the others I love are safe. It is both an unselfish and selfish motive: I want their life to be long and healthy and I want the fun and glory of shared times with all these wonderful people as I grow older.

As it has been with the other children in my life when they became young adults,  I hope and pray it will be with Javonna as she enters college in a few years – that is that we will continue to share great conversations, give one another support and have great adventures [our first was a few years ago on MLK Day at The Philadelphia Constitution Center – especially poignant day as my beloved Father, Abraham was a civil rights activist/marched on D.C. with Dr. King and Javonna is one-half African American].  It is also great fun that Javonna and I both love the gorgeous Jewish rapper Drake, that we can discuss flicks and clothes – it is equally satisfying that I believe I have made a difference in this sweet young lady’s life.

My personal plan to be a grand dame – surrounded by not only my own children and grandchildren, nieces, nephews, etc. but my extended and surrogate family – in homes full of love and laughter.

I LOVE YOU JAVONNA S. &   I AM PROUD  & HONORED THAT YOU CALL ME AUNT TEREZA!!!

June 24, 2012

Why & How I Am One Of The Happiest Women In The World!!!

by Teréza Eliasz-Solomon (HeiressMommy™)

The main reasons for my being one of the happiest women in the world are #1. Self Determination and #2. G-d. There is no magic involved – some really good luck and a great deal of hard work is the formula for my abundant happiness. Tragically not everyone got the memo – granted some unhappy people can not help it due to untended mental health problems but other misanthropes are unhappy merely because they are greedy, mean and selfish. I hope the revelations I will share in my book “Heiress Mommy”  will help those most unhappy among us but I know that no book or life story can help those not touched by the grace of G-d …no help for the evil doers among us as they will defeat themselves by their own deeds and thoughts. So be it  – here is a short primer or preface to what I hope my book will further explain.

Being fully happy does not mean that one is never stressed, upset, anxious, sad, disappointed or worried. 100% happiness actually means that even when you are dealing with negative feelings or occurrences, you are still basically and intrinsically happy. I once was accused by a quite foolish and not very intellectually astute young woman of being “obsessed” with a sworn enemy …I explained [as simply as I could] to this troubled person that I was never obsessed but instead determined to thwart this evil and assure justice for myself and my family. Even during times where my considerable energy is taxed by such an effort, I am a happy woman ..content in the knowledge of my own self worth and place in this world.

The Ancient Philosophers wrote extensively about what happiness was and how one obtains happiness. Epicurus point of view was “whom is enough too little, nothing is enough”. Who has not known someone that no matter what they have or are given, think they did not get their so called fair share …in other words, those people who think the world or a particular person owes them more than they deserve? Socrates actually listed three things to maintain toward the goal of happiness: 1. Keep interested in the truth ..for myself and my husband, that includes pursuing needed facts about those who would harm us – easy with the internet, et. al.; 2. Make sure that your soul is as good as possible …this does NOT include faux cult like inspired quotes or dictates from some bogus guru as to what one needs to do for a redeemed soul; 3. to get a good soul maintain 4 virtues: prudence, courage, temperance  and justice [charity]. There are other ancient, historical and modern day philosophers that pontificate with equal validity as to the route to happiness – the problem is the many false prophets who only goal is ego satisfying and financial gain through their bogus dictates on happiness.  Sadly, the uneducated and weak minded among us fall victim to these false prophet types …then again could it be the followers of these jousters are themselves evil doers and have just found their equal part in such leaders? Oh well, that is for another time – my only point is to insist you, as I have, never let these devils deter you from your own deserved happiness – fight them and expose them and then live your well deserved happy life.

I twitter and facebook with business tycoon and TV personality Bethenny Frankel. I just finished her wonderful and inspiring book: “A Place Of Yes”. Unlike myself, who was fortunate to have my Jewish faith and progressive parents to teach me optimism, dear Bethenny had to learn it on her own …BRAVO  smart lady. This accomplished woman and I share the life philosophy that one must seize opportunities in order to be really happy. I wish I could share my own detailed story here of how that idea about recognizing and going for it has made my life spectacular but my wonderful supportive publicist and my book obligation leaves  me only able to hope  that my finally decided on to be released soon books will be something you read to learn much more about how my determination and recognition of what I needed in life has led to great joy and contentment. I do want to say that like Bethenny, I do not think there is any magic formula to being happy …it takes hard work both mentally and physically [including a life time of exercise & nutritional maintenance, etc.] and luck – I have been blessed with a great family, opportunities, love, angel friends

Friends are Angels who lift our feet when our own wings have trouble remembering how to fly.

and the most supportive colleagues in the world. But the trick is I had the good sense and eyes to see those I needed in my life in order to be happy [I admit there have been some misjudgments as well – but, thank G-d, even those have eventually led to the best for me, including being married to the most amazing man for the last nine years and having his support to go through very expensive & often uncomfortable fertility treatments to have children together later in life].

I so wish I could share more …suffice it to say there have been tragedies in my life, missteps but more blessings and glory – all will be in my book “Heiress Mommy”, which I hope will be not only enjoyable to read but helpful to those  struggling.

I leave you with a link to Charlie Brown’s happiness song – trust me that it is worth listening to …your a good man Charlie Brown and All GOOD people deserve to be happy – the rest can be punished as G-d sees fit. Shalom!!!

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